I was at a RIE® class just watching my daughter when she all of a sudden walked up to a boy and took the toy he was playing with! I was of course mortified and was about to get up and “correct” the behavior, i.e. either tell her to give the toy back or do it myself. RIE Associate Melani Ladygo stepped in and stopped me. She had me just watch my daughter and this boy interact with no judgement. They went back and forth, taking the toy from each other.
In my mind I was thinking “he had it first – give it back”. Melani saw my discomfort and said “How great that your daughter knows what she wants, and takes it!”
I started crying because I knew that was true. And I also knew it’s not how I was raised. I was raised to wait my turn, to wait to be invited or asked, and to never take anything.
That day taught me a lot, both for healing my own upbringing and moving forward for myself, but for the kind of daughter I want to raise. I have become more of an advocate for myself and have started to “take what I want” in life, and I’m feeling like that’s a good example to set for my daughter.
I am eternally grateful for Melani and for all the RIE classes we attended.
– Marika Cahn, Parent
RIE Principle: Freedom to explore and interact with other infants
Educaring® Principle: Freedom to Interact with Other Children
Is RIE® Permissive?
Educaring® Moment:
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